Paw Patrol is releasing the beloved pup cop ‘Chase’ in a unifying move of solidarity with Black Lives Matter. That’s right, Chase is no longer on the case.
Mayor Goodway called a town hall meeting to praise the decision.
“These decisions will help rid our town of oppressive systemic racism,” said the black female mayor.
Chase was set to be replaced as Ryder's second-hand man by Marshal, the Dalmatian fire dog, but shortly after the decision was announced, the woke crowds of America’s living rooms responded in rage at the fact that a primarily white dog was taking the place of the brutal cop.
“It defeats the purpose,” said one social justice warrior from his mom’s basement, probably.
Team leader Ryder immediately agreed that Marshal should be fired because of the fur color he was born with. Ryder then quickly kneeled in submission and wept dramatically, “how could I have ever been such an ignorant, uncultured swine that I would hire a white dog!?”
Ryder secretly told Chase and Marshal they’d be back on the squad soon, once America finds something new to care about. So, the pups are expected to return like next week.